January 24, 2014
By: Christina Bianchini
Easy relationship guidelines make a difference right from the beginning – yes, even from that first bowl of popcorn! We will share with you some of our do’s and don’ts
On the Beat 94.5 the question was asked, “On a second date, if your date says ‘no’ to sharing popcorn, does that mean that they are not into you?”
This is where relationships begin to go off course; not because they are not into you, but because you are asking yourself the wrong question!
Here is what is wrong with that question:
- your focus is all about their feelings and thoughts
- you are talking to your friends about their point of view and not your date
- you are over personalizing their choice
What you can do to help build a relationship
- be clear with yourself on what your goal is in spending time with them; is it for fun, dating, a relationship etc.?
- stick to your goal
- ask yourself: are into them? what is happening with your feelings?
- How come sharing popcorn matters to you? It may be important, it may represent something else – if so, make sure that, what it represents is realistic for a second date.
Ultimately, if you know what you are looking for is a potential relationship, then this first part is important. Some of the things required to build long-term relationships are:
- to be curious about how the other person sees the world,
- to try new things
- to have fun together
- an ability to be flexible
- to show you can understand the other
- to know yourself
At our house we love popcorn, everyone gets their own bowl and we are totally into each other! So who knows – they just may be into you!